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Just like that he's gone.
This is the worst heart ache I've felt in a long time....
I'll be okay though.
I'll be strong, and when I see him again the distance will mean nothing.
Letting someone go that you love, is so much harder than breaking up.
I really hope this helps me develop into a great individual.
Isn't that what all this angsty stuff is suppose to do?
I sure hope so. Time to to remain optimistic.
Hello sunny day.
Today is the last day I have to spend time with him.
Tomorrow is the going away party.. Saturday he leaves.
I don't feel okay. Not right now. I'm managing to hold it together.. But I just want him to stay.
This feels so surreal. He was suppose to leave this time last year, and now he actually is.
I don't feel like I've conveyed enough of my emotions, requested enough of his touch, or heard enough of his voice. It feels so sudden, but the reality is that it isn't.
I'm going to miss him so terribly. I feel like I've built myself up so much since I've met him, and even since we've become lovers.. I'm just not sure what to do with myself at this moment..
Tonight is going to be emotional, reassuring.. beautiful.
It's going to be very hard to let him go..
The stars lean down to kiss you
And I lie awake and miss you
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere
'Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly
But I'll miss your arms around me
I'd send a postcard to you dear
'Cause I wish you were here
I'll watch the night turn light blue
But it's not the same without you
Because it takes two to whisper quietly
The silence isn't so bad
Till I look at my hands and feel sad
'Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly
I'll find repose in new ways
Though I haven't slept in two days
'Cause cold nostalgia chills me to the boneBut drenched in vanilla twilight
I'll sit on the front porch all night
Waist-deep in thought because when I think of you
I don't feel so alone
Yesterday was eventful & good, yet I was filled with anxiety. Even now I still am..
My coffee date with said girly went surprisingly well. I'm thinking were going to hangout more. I'm excited. :)
I did some shopping and bought some tickets to a festival. That was nice.
But I can't help but think about how I only have one more week with my boy..
I feel like I'm slowly crumbling from the inside. I'm going to miss him so much, I don't think I'm prepared for this. But I'm going to try to be strong.
I've had some time to think about my feelings & discuss them with someone dear to me, and now I'm starting to feel better. I think.
I feel like last night we managed to connect on a different level than we've been able to in the past. Almost like some things are beginning to get resolved.
I still wish things could be different in some respects, but for now I'm doing better than I was.
I'm glad I'm still close to him. His presence give me tranquility.
